Monday, February 11, 2008

the plight of the mayonnaise

so here i sit. feeling horrible. with a fever. and a cough. unable to make the effort to press the shift button to make capital letters. but unable to walk away from the computer without posting something today. so here for your enjoyment is a conversation i overheard today.

background information - anna grace asked me if the mayonnaise that was in the refrigerator was ok to eat. i said yes, thinking she was putting it on something she planned to eat. she then took out a little packet that came with some meal we ordered and ate it plain. making comments the whole time.

ag - look at that yummy blob of mayonnaise
ag in a mayonnaise sounding voice - no...don't eat me!
ag - i have to...you need me to.
mayonnaise - but i have children in this package
ag - don't worry i will eat them, too.
mayonnaise - all i wanted was to be spread on some bread or eaten with french fries.
ag - i have to eat you plain. you are so good plain...muhahahahahahah.

so she did.


Tamara said...

That is, quite possibly, the most disgusting thing I have ever read. Mayo...straight from the package...and mayo babies, too! gag.

Sorry about your fever...sounds like ag is trying to keep you sick.

Natalie said...

tamara - honestly it made me sick to my stomach to watch her squeezing the package and then licking the mayonnaise blobs. i couldn't watch.

Bekah said...

Hi, I kind of randomly ran across your blog and noticed you live in Turkey. I'm a student at a University in Oklahoma and am considering studying abroad in Turkey. Do you mind if I ask you some questions about living there as an American (I'm assuming you are American I guess). My email is rkay.stone@gmail.com if you are interested in helping me out!

Anonymous said...

My only questions is: has she eaten mayonnaise straight from the package before or was this just a random act of condiment abuse? I loved the story. :o)

Gina said...



I don't know what to think about your children.

Natalie said...

cathy - yes she has had mayo straight from the package before. in turkey french fries are served with mayo and ketchup for dipping. ag usually eats the rest of her mayo with her finger when her fries are gone. this is the first time that i know of where she ate the entire packet sans fries. it was definitely abuse for sure!

gina - i agree wholeheartedly!

coppedge - well. me neither. sometimes i really don't.

rkay - an email is on the way.