A warning

Remember that camping trip we went on last week? The one where my husband cried in the video because he was being eaten alive by mosquitoes. Yeah...that's the one. Well I am somewhat upset about one of the outcomes of that trip. See when Brian gets a mosquito bite he feels it. He can swat at the offending mosquito and at least make an attempt to kill it. He may end up mosquito bitten, but he has wreaked havoc on the mosquito population anywhere near him by killing a number of their little friends. Mosquitoes don't stand a chance around him.

Then there's me. I don't feel the mosquitoes when they bite me. My kids were swatting at mosquitoes all evening. Brian was crying and whining about the mosquitoes, and I just sat there. Occasionally one of the kids would smack me under the pretense that I had a mosquito on me. I didn't believe them, because I never felt any biting me. I could see the bites on my family, but I was immune to those mosquitoes. Or so I thought. 2 days after arriving at home I started feeling those bites. And at last count I had 23 mosquito bites on my left leg below my knee. 23! The right leg has just as many. I have three on my face and neck. I have some on my back and one in an unmentionable place. I have been taking benedryl, because I can barely stand the itching. And the thing is I wouldn't mind the bites so much if I had gotten a few punches in myself. I just sat there and let them eat me. Mosquitoes heed my warning. Next time I even so much as see a mosquito I am spanking me some mosquito butt. For real!

Memories

Tonight for dinner I made biscuits and gravy. Not the most healthy thing we could have had, but it was the requested meal. When we lived in the states I never made biscuits from scratch. Oh there was a time I used Bisquick and called them homemade, but now I know that they really weren't. There is no such thing as a can of biscuits here. You can't find them frozen or premade in any shape or fashion. In fact biscuits aren't something Turks even eat. I mean they would if they had them, but it isn't a normal bread form here.

So the biscuit recipe I usually use is this...2 cups of self-rising flour and 1 cup of heavy cream. That is it. Mix it together roll or press them to about 1/2 inch thickness and cut out with a glass. Now they don't have self-rising flour here so I add 2 1/2 tsp baking powder and 3/4 tsp salt to the flour and mix before I add the cream. The biscuits are to die for in my opinion. So easy and so yummy. If you want you can add some sugar...maybe 1/4 cup to the dry ingredients if you like your biscuits sweeter.

But tonight I had to use a different recipe. I was out of cream, and I had already started mixing up the other ingredients. I quickly found a recipe for buttermilk biscuits and since I had ayran which is a yogurt drink similiar to buttermilk I decided to go that route. After mixing the dry ingredients I started to cut in the butter. Wow...memories flooded over me. Then I added the buttermilk and almost started to cry. My grandmother made buttermilk biscuits every time I went to visit her. She mixed them with her hands...exactly like I was doing. The smell of the buttermilk as I mixed it in was like stepping back in time. The movement of my hands as I slowly formed a ball of dough in the middle of the bowl...picking up more and more flour from the sides as I moved my hand around transported me back to her kitchen in the tiny town of Emerson, Arkansas.

I'll never forget that place. That house. That kitchen. Where so many memories were cooked up. Memories of homemade sweet pickles...juicy and sticky. Memories of fried fish. Memories of chicken and dumplings, turnip greens, purple hull peas, cornbread, and chocolate pie. There were lots of other memories made there, but tonight it was the thought of the food that overwhelmed me. And even though I have learned to make many of those things they still don't taste quite like hers did.

Open Thursday

Today we are packing the family up and headed out for an overnight camping trip. We are going to this place. We've been there twice before, but for some reason I never had my camera. I wanted pictures and have managed to whine about wanting to go back enough that Brian has finally given in. Brian doesn't mind camping so much. We went some when we lived in the states. He just doesn't like camping in the summer. In the heat. In the humidity. This place is up in the mountains so hopefully it won't be too hot...or humid. So I am calling this day...Open Thursday. Share what you want in the comments. Have a discussion amongst yourselves. I am turning off comment moderation so that they can publish all on their own. Please don't disappoint me. When I get back on Friday I want to see that people had fun in my comment section. Clean, wholesome fun. (Don't you just love when I throw that in there?)

Over-indulgence in all things American!

Yesterday we celebrated the 4th with lots of other Americans on the military base here in town. They had bbq pork sandwiches, Dr. Pepper, Root Beer, Crunchy Cheetos, and many other American goodies for us to indulge in. Yummy!


This picture was taken shortly after we arrived. Brian commented that I looked like that guy...um...what's his name? Eddie Van Halen. Um...ok. Then he said let me take your picture so you can see yourself. Um...ok. Then he said it was more like a cross between Eddie and David Lee Roth! Since I happen to love Van Halen I am pretty ok with that. I mean hello...Panama? Who didn't love that song?

Speaking of music the entertainment at the festivities this year was great! No Turkish Elvis Impersonators. The band played a great mix of songs from almost every genre. And then between sets they blasted songs from Maroon 5, Def Leppard, Evanescence, Eric Clapton, Bryan Adams, Newsboys, Beatles, Lynyrd Skynyrd, and the Eagles among others.



Brian and Will enjoyed a game of basketball with a few other people.


There were Starbucks employees walking around giving out free coffee. That would have been nice if it hadn't been stinkin' hot outside. Oh well...it was the thought that counted.


Will and I enjoyed throwing the ol' pigskin around. Now let me say this before everyone else does. I throw like a girl. Most of the time. But keep in mind that this picture is of me in motion. I am not holding the ball at the end. It is beginning to move away from my hand at this point. Adam took this picture. He took it because he and Brian want to show the football guys that "even Brian's wife has good form. She is throwing off her front foot. She has her elbow up. Come on guys even Natalie can do it." I will confess that I am totally weak. If Will had been much further away there is no way I could have thrown the football hard enough to reach him. Later we changed to a Nerf football, and then my throwing ability improved dramatically. I may not be good, but I am willing.


Jacob hurt his leg climbing on some rocks so he was sitting out for a bit. We took this opportunity to get some pictures with him.


Notice the crime scene tape in the background. There really wasn't a crime directly behind us. That area was set aside for important people. We sat as close to the important people as we could. It didn't make us feel more important though. Actually it reminded us of how unimportant we really were. Oh well...we were having fun! And that is what counted.


Will doing what he does best. Entertain the little kids. Seriously...they all love him, and he loves it. He would be an awesome babysitter. He wants to babysit. He doesn't think it's fair that the girls in his class get all the babysitting calls. He thinks he is being sexually discriminated against. Call him!


Hope your day was awesome.

Yeah...we laughed.

Approximately one hour after Brian mentioned that his chair felt slightly unstable...






Yeah...I'm taking your picture...smile!

emotional girls

the day before yesterday anna grace came home telling me about this readers' theater her class was doing on friday...today. here's how the conversation went...

ag - will you come see my readers' theater on friday?
me - of course i will.
ag - ok. it's first thing in the morning.
me - ok...i'll be there.

yesterday ag came home and asked again.

ag - tomorrow we have readers' theater. here's my script. i'm the third elephant. are you coming?
me - yes, i said i would.
ag - i know, but last time you couldn't come.
me - ag, if i wasn't sure i would tell you that i'm not sure i'll be able to make it. i don't have anything else that i have to do. i'll be there.
ag - ok...it's at 9:45 now. she changed the time.
me - ok.

then this morning...

ag - today is my readers' theater.
me - i know.
ag - are you coming?
me - yes, i promise i will be there.
ag - it's at 9:45.
me - i know. you told me.
ag - ok...be sure to be there.
me - ok

at 8:43 the phone rings.

ag - MOM, READERS' THEATER IS AT 8:45 NOT 9:45
me - ag, i don't think i can get there in 2 minutes. i still have my pjs on and it takes 10 minutes to walk to the school.
ag - MOM, PLEASE! MY TEACHER SAID WE WOULD GO LAST.
me - ok...i'll try to make it.

i throw on clothes and am out the door in about 3 minutes. i walk/run up the hill all the way to the school. i get to the school, and there is one group doing their play. ag is sitting on the ground watching. i lean against the back wall and try not to pass out since i hadn't eaten anything and practically killed myself getting to the school.

ag sees me and mouths - you missed it.

then she came over to me and burst into tears saying that her group went first not last. so i sat down against the back wall and held her. then i started to cry as well. i missed it. after all of that i missed it.

Happy hair

Today Erica came home from school begging to get her hair colored. One of her friends had been to the kuafor here and had red streaks put in her hair. And by red I mean hot pink. She went to school today and was told that she had to have a natural color...that red was ok, but pink was not. She was heading back to the kuafor to have her pink streaks changed to red, and Erica begged to go along and have hers done as well. As some of you may know we are pretty open to hairstyles in our family. I mean...it's just hair. It will grow out, fade, possibly fall out, and soon a new crop of hair will take it's place. I was fine with her having her hair done but thought I should ask Brian what he thought. He said that it was a girl thing so it was my decision. Then he wanted to know what color she planned to dye her hair. I told him red. His response...like clown red or Nicole Kidman red? Well, I'm pretty sure, based on the hot pink hair, that she means clown red. He said it was still up to me. I said yes. So she went.


And she came home.


And now I am wondering how natural this color really is. I mean Elmo pulls it off and he's a natural redhead.

Then I proved to be the coolest, hippest mom on the planet. Erica was explaining that this is the hairstyle she wanted when we were in the states. The time I wouldn't let her color her hair. I said I wasn't sure how it would be taken there. We were newly back. I didn't want her to be judged or labeled based on her hair color. She said were you worried I would be considered emo? And I so knew what emo was! Because when Erica walked in the door (at 7:30pm) to show off her new hair we happened to have two 20something girls visiting us from the states. After Erica walked out of the room they said that her hair looked kinda emo and then explained that it was short for emotional. Not exactly goth or punk, but emo. One hour later when Erica used the term emo I acted like I had known that term my whole life. Ahhh...the joys of being one step ahead!

pet peeve #49

is making lunches for the kids on school days. i hate it. if all of my kids would eat the same thing it wouldn't be so bad. one likes grilled cheese. one likes pb&j but only on turkish bread. one is allergic to peanuts. one hates sandwiches all together. one never knows what they want. one would love to have leftovers if we ever had them. i have four kids, but their tastes in chips, juice, snacks, and pretty much everything having to do with making a lunch are completely different. after several months of morning-lunch-making frustration i came up with a system that has taken away at least part of the stress of school lunches.

introducing the bucket system...

after making whatever main food item each kid desires i leave the rest up to them. they can choose one sweet snack, one salty snack, and one drink. there is also a bowl of fruit, yogurt, veggies, and various other refrigerated items if desired.


the salty bucket includes a variety of pretzels, chips, and crackers.


the sweet bucket includes snack cakes, candy bars, and cookies.


juices...apple, cherry, orange, peach, and mixed fruit.

it may not always be the most healthy lunch, but i can guarantee that the stress that the bucket system relieved would have killed me before these snacks will kill them!

Rising to the level of mediocrity

For the past few months Erica has been going to musical/play practice. The Turkish American Association was doing a rendition of Disney's teen blockbuster film High School Musical. Erica got wind of it and decided she wanted to try out. She was awarded the part of a cheerleader.


(Her mother was secretly happy she didn't have a major role since she had never done anything like this before!) So rehearsals started. In January. And so for the last 4 months we have dealt with getting Erica to and from rehearsals...three times a week.

Now this is where I need to come clean and admit that I do not drive in Turkey. I have never driven in Turkey. So when I say WE have dealt with getting Erica to and from rehearsals I mean that I have thought about it, but other than that and making a few phone calls to check to see who was driving I have had it relatively easy. Brian and another family took turns driving carpool for the practices. As time for the performances (there were 4!) drew near the practice schedule increased to include Saturday and Sunday practices as well. The great thing about living in Turkey is that there is ample public transportation so after a bit the kids were able to get to and from the practices some on their own. I think we were all happy about this!

Sunday night I was able to attend the final show. It was great. The kids' hard work really paid off.

And now here is where I make my point. Just in case you were wondering. I do have a point.

Is it bad to hope that my kids are never so great at something that they have years of 3-5 practices a week as well as shows, performances, games, matches, meets, and fairs? If I only had one child I might be able to handle it, but there are four of them. Thankfully Erica is almost driving age so if when we are back in the states the acting bug hits again she will soon be able to drive herself to practices.

Will will be in 7th grade next year. All of Will's desires for extra-curricular activities revolve around sports so junior high athletics is the perfect place for him to hone his skills. And they have late buses. Those buses that take the kids who stay after school for some sports reason or because they were in after-school detention home barely in time for dinner. I was never good enough at sports or bad enough behaviorally to take the late bus. But I know they exist. So that gets me out of being practice chauffeur, but there are still all those games to go to.

Jacob is my smart kid. He loves to read and do math homework. He has participated in sports for the past 5 years because all of his friends were doing it. We recently finished a season of basketball where Jacob jammed his finger slightly and quickly declared that this was the last time he was going to play basketball. Now he is participating in soccer and has already decided that he is done with it as well. This comes as no surprise to me. He is not a skilled sportsman. I asked him if he would be interested in swimming. He said "for fun, but I don't want to do races." We listed several other sports and nothing really stood out to him. He did, however, enjoy the recent science fair that he participated in. He worked hard to make sure his board and project were exceptional. I fully expect academic decathlons to be in his future. Maybe even band. Sigh.

Anna Grace is only 8. She has never been interested in sports. Of any kind. She would probably be great at them if she would try them because she has the build for it. She also doesn't have the stamina to do 4 months of rehearsals for a 4 show play. At least not yet. She gets bored easily so nothing ever sounds good or fun for long. When she saw the play she said she would like to try out next time. I'll believe that when I see it. She doesn't care much about playing an instrument or reading books. She spends her time watching movies and bugging her siblings. Maybe AG is destined for mediocrity. Just like her mother. I'm so proud!

hi

So it is 1am, and I am up. Shocker. Considering I was on death's doorstep for over 24 hours and the fact that I slept on that doorstep for said 24 hours I am not tired. I am awake. It could also partially be because I drank a lot and I do mean A LOT of diet coke today. I also ate food. Good tasting, real food. For the first time in 2 days. I make a pathetic sick person. I like food too much. Good food. So the whole time I am sick I still have the desire to eat. I didn't this time, but only because I didn't have the desire to see that food again. And believe me I would have. But as soon as I could eat food without worrying about a repeat performance I indulged. And now because I ate food today...not a lot of food...but more than enough my stomach feels tight. And I don't mean tight in the I've been doing stomach crunches kind of way. I mean in that I shouldn't have eaten those french fries and had quite so much diet coke kind of way. So I am not tired, my stomach is mad at me, and I am blogging about it. I so need a life!

rumbly in my tumbly

On Friday I subbed at the kids' school. Well, I kinda subbed. At noon I had to ask to go home. I had been fighting an upset tummy, and well, it got to the point where I knew I couldn't make it. So a sub was called in to finish the day for me. What makes it even funnier is that I was already subbing for the original sub. When the teacher comes back on Monday she is going to be so confused I know!

Today I'm still not feeling great. I have been drinking water, but it is making me gag. It doesn't taste good at all. Brian was sweet and went to the store to get me this.


We call it a bloody orange. That is pretty much the literal translation. I have a feeling there isn't any actual blood orange juice in it, but hey, actual citrus juice would probably mess my stomach up. I'll take the fake stuff.

So...that's it. Nothing exciting happening around here. (Well, that's not exactly true, but we are saving that for a later post.)

a really good blog post idea.

ok...so i was thinking today about a couple of things that would make really good blog posts. now i am sitting here trying to remember what they were. honestly, they were good! thinking back on my day. what did i do? what triggered these awesome blog post ideas? slept late, rainy weather, ate pizza for lunch, talked to family, took a nap, went to the store, took a shower, went to a baby shower. yeah...pretty much nothing that would trigger a blog post. maybe it was a dream. maybe i had a dream about this awesome blog post idea. man. i guess i could pose a question.

after reading the ideas for the flavor of a bag of country doritos i started wondering about other flavors. gina said road kill possum or squirrel would make a great red-neck doritos flavor. cracked me up. anyone else have any good dorito flavors?

i know...lame blog post. but really i had something good. i'll keep thinking. you just send me chip flavor ideas, ok? thanks.

my day so far

1. brian and i went to the grocery store this morning. we were busy yapping in the car about important things like the differences between an organized crowd of people and a chaotic crowd of people and how horns on little cars don't sound intimidating at all, and brian missed the turn. instead of turning around and going back the way he knew he decided to cut through neighborhoods. one hour later we arrived at the grocery store. while we didn't discover a back way to the grocery store we did go through a neighborhood called "sanatoriyum". i think an old mental hospital used to be there. i can't imagine giving my address to people from america and having to say i live in sanatoriyum. while my mental state may often be in question by some of my friends i certainly wouldn't want them to think i had been committed!

2. after looking around for the chicken and hamburger meat at the grocery store we discovered it behind some sliding glass doors. the sign said press the button to enter. we did and ended up in the huge walk-in freezer of the store. it was true...not only were there sides of beef and mutton hanging from hooks in the ceiling, but packages of meat were displayed for sale in there as well. i was wearing capris, a short-sleeve shirt, and flip flops. i'm pretty sure i froze my ovaries, but i don't plan to have any more children so i guess that is ok. after escaping the freezer i noticed some heavy coats on hangers right outside the freezer. i guess they were for customers to put on before entering. not freezing your ovaries is pretty important around here.

3. after spending $2018592.42 on groceries we came home, and i took a nap. the reason for my nap is noted in point number 4.

4. while at the store the headache i went to bed with last night officially became a migraine. a headache officially becomes a migraine when there are tears pouring from one or both of my eyes. while i could have blamed it on my ovaries freezing i knew it for what it was. it has been at least a month since my last migraine...longer even i think. i am still loopy on medicine and suffering other side effects as well. this medicine makes me extra sensitive to touch. if i touch any part of my body with any other part of my body i feel it more. kinda like i am slightly bruised there. mostly that is ok. the part i don't like is when i put carmex on and rub my lips together. that hurts. i would rather my lips hurt than my head though.

Chocolate covered coffee beans are full of caffeine. Trust me.

Tonight 11 of us gathered to celebrate a friend's birthday. We kidnapped her and took her to Kahve Dunyasi (Coffee World) for a birthday coffee.


We laughed, had discussions about special brews (and not the coffee flavored kind), and ate entirely too many chocolate covered coffee beans. (Notice that I am the only one still wearing my coat. I wore it the entire time. It was so cold. I put on cute clothes for the occasion and then didn't even get to show them off. Trust me. I was looking good! Of course that could be the caffeine talking...I am wired!)


Can anyone spell COW? Sara enjoyed the last of the chocolate fondue with a spoon. She saw me pull out my camera as she was getting ready to scrape the bowl and knew that the picture would end up on the blog. I hate to disappoint!


Not wanting to be outdone by Sara...Liz ordered a plate of chocolate spoons and chocolate covered coffee beans. Forget scraping the bottom of the fondue bowl with a metal spoon...just give me a chocolate spoon and skip a step!


My yummy caramel cappuccino. With a chocolate spoon of course!


Tiffany...the birthday girl...and Abby.

Newlywed game

I have had a lot on my mind the past few days so posting has kinda taken a back burner. Here are two pictures from a rousing game we played the other night with 4 other couples. The game...the newlywed game. The teams...Wildcatz, Nut Jobs, Firinda, Yeter, and McAttack. Yep...we were the Nut Jobs.

Our host for the evening Alexander Supertramp (aka Adam)

He was looking strapping in a blue plaid shirt, a cowboy tie, and Brian's suit coat that was quite short in the arms.


Couple number one...oh wait...no this is Brian and Dave. I had the camera out to take a picture of this cute couple and ended up not taking any pictures of the actual couples. Oh well. Those guys are hard to beat.

(How come people warn each other that the pictures I am taking will be on the blog when they see me pull out my camera? Of course they will be on my blog. I have to document my life. Yep, if you are in my pictures you will be on my blog! It's too bad I didn't get any more this night. I would have loved to have a video of the whole Nut Job = vasectomy = don't get snippy with me discussion. So funny. Ahhh... And no...Brian didn't have a vasectomy...since I know that is what you are thinking. We were the Nut Jobs because of our extensive work in the hazelnut fields here in Turkey. Um...yeah.)

Winter Formal

Erica's winter formal - hair and dress pictures. For those who know her and care.

Who wants to be the weakest link?

Brian is watching Turkish game shows. He does this to feel smart. To feel like he knows Turkish better than the Turks. He has serious pride issues. He imagines himself going on these game shows which are very similar to Who Wants To Be A Millionaire? and wowing the crowd of 5 people with his extreme knowledge.

So far they've asked questions like "What famous magician locked himself underwater and was from Hungary?" The answers to choose from were Harry Houdini, David Copperfield, and two people we never heard of. The poor guy trying to answer the question had to ask for the audiences' help and use his 50/50 chance which then narrowed it down to Harry and David. He thought and thought and thought. There were commercials involved. It went on forever. He finally went against the audience and chose Harry. Thank goodness that was over.

Next question. "In which form of art would you use the term pirouette?" The choices for answers...opera, ballet, painting, and sculpture. Seriously. It took the poor guy forever to narrow it down to opera or ballet...finally deciding to go with opera. Seriously!

Finally that show was over. Next game show...exact same thing except three players are pitted against each other...more like The Weakest Link. And on this show they take even longer to answer the questions. The question...Which one of these was not a historic business road? The silk road, the spice road, the kings road, or the Istanbul road. Yep...they got it wrong...guessing spice road.

I am begging him to turn the channel. If he doesn't I may have to cry like the one contestant who cried her way through the entire program. Her husband probably made her participate. Seriously.

Wait a minute...the host is now crying. He feels for the contestant. And now Brian sees a number to dial in so that he can apply to be on the show. But wait there's more...the host is bringing in the son of the poor woman who is in debt and needs the money. There are tears all around. Brian is even crying saying he would trade all his useless knowledge to know Turkish as well as these people. Good grief.

the plight of the mayonnaise

so here i sit. feeling horrible. with a fever. and a cough. unable to make the effort to press the shift button to make capital letters. but unable to walk away from the computer without posting something today. so here for your enjoyment is a conversation i overheard today.

background information - anna grace asked me if the mayonnaise that was in the refrigerator was ok to eat. i said yes, thinking she was putting it on something she planned to eat. she then took out a little packet that came with some meal we ordered and ate it plain. making comments the whole time.

ag - look at that yummy blob of mayonnaise
ag in a mayonnaise sounding voice - no...don't eat me!
ag - i have to...you need me to.
mayonnaise - but i have children in this package
ag - don't worry i will eat them, too.
mayonnaise - all i wanted was to be spread on some bread or eaten with french fries.
ag - i have to eat you plain. you are so good plain...muhahahahahahah.

so she did.

Shut up, Brian. Shut up.

After the post on words meaning things I thought of this little gem of a conversation that took place between Brian and a brand new local friend.

Friend: Brain, where are you from?
Brian: California
Friend: Really, Brain? I love that song "Californication" by the Red Hot Chili Peppers
Brian: Oh, um...well that is different. California is a state in America. Fornication is...


Yep. He tried to explain fornication...in English and Turkish making this face and gesture. What he should have said...

Brian: Oh, um...I don't think I've ever heard that song.

The End.

Words mean things.

I make up words to try to convey what I am feeling. I combine words to extend the meaning of what I am trying to say. And I go with words my kids have made up because the new words best describe the feeling or condition. For example...
adorability - the ability to be completely and totally adorable without trying
slaptastic - so fantastic I feel like someone slapped me silly
mooley - kinda like constipated (coined by Will when he was 4 and used ever since)

This doesn't work well in another language. Case in point. Brian. Who should know better after this incident but doesn't.

Brian, being the nice guy that he is, agreed to take a van load of Turks somewhere. Our van seats 13, but he probably had about 20 people crammed in it this day. Everyone is talking and joking and basically enjoying themselves. Brian is telling a story. Trying to be funny. He ends with the punchline. Then in order to make sure everyone knows he's just joking he decides to tell them that. But in the milliseconds of thinking before speaking he decides instead to say "I'm just lying". Which is fine...if he says it the right way. Instead of going with what he knows how to say, "I'm just telling a lie" he opts to go with a word that in his mind should mean, "I'm just lying." He combined the verb "lie" with what would be the proper ending in many cases. And then he said the new word aloud. The van got quiet. He wondered what he said...knowing full well that he had said something wrong somewhere. Our good friend, Derya, who happened to be sitting next to him leaned over and said, "you just said 'I'm licking myself'." Brian laughed. No one else did. When they got to their destination they all quietly filed out of the van. Brian laughed. He told me when he got home. I just shook my head and laughed. He will never learn. Poor, poor Brian.